Living My True Self on Purpose

An Intimate Lesson A client asked me recently to write about cheating in romantic relationships. This is a touchy subject because it stings so much. I’ve experienced the pain of cheating first hand, and I can tell you I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. All a relationship is after all is two people learning how to trust one another. Trust is the foundation of everything else. Without trust, there isn’t a relationship. When cheating happens, that trust is shattered. And it’s very hard to get it back (not impossible). There are different perspectives on cheating. For me, it’s a deal breaker. For my therapist, she has seen many a couple work through it and come back even stronger. There’s no right or wrong way to look at it, but there is a deeper lesson inside the painful act of cheating that I’d like to speak to. I’ve worked with many clients who have been cheated on in different ways: sexually and emotionally. Sexual cheating is when you have sex outside the relations...

“Everything I’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.” —David Foster Wallace The new moon was beautiful, but it lasted only so long. Once it was over, it was over. In time, perfection is tainted by life’s hurried blemishes, to die a thousand deaths.  We often look at the things we enjoy—relationships, experiences, possessions—and we want to hold on to them forever. We expect that these things will continue to add the same value to our lives, day in and day out. However, they don't and we tend to hang on to that past value for dear life, like a wild animal to its season's first food.   And letting go of distractions or huge mental burdens (that can also become physical as stress and worries pile up), can be just that type of feat. Today, I hope I can share some techniques for letting go of emotional suffering. The best way to get rid of painful and negative emotions is to let them go. Learning to let go of the emotions is extremely difficult. Letting go of...

As human beings we are constantly comparing ourselves to others. To any men reading this article, this is not just a “female thing”. Men do it too, you compare cars; golf clubs; boats; positions/titles in companies; bodies in the gym……. come on, be honest.  You do! Ladies, I know that you will understand what I am taking about. If you are completely honest, you will admit that we compare ourselves with each other all- the- time :- our clothes, our hair, our kid’s behavior, kid’s school marks, who looks thinner, who is fitter, who appears more successful; who entertains the best, who cooks the best etc… WE ALL DO IT. We compare ourselves with others and then when we don’t measure up to our perceived standards we get disappointed in ourselves. We tell ourselves we are not good enough, we tell ourselves we have failed in some way. The thing is, if we do this long enough we end up feeling like a failure in many areas of our lives. When we constantly put ourselves down and desi...

At a young age, I lost trust in others because the person I trusted most coming into the world had broken it. While they tried their hardest to create an environment of love and mask the  fear , I lost trust in my adult family mentors ability to protect me.  While I have a great relationship with them now, you can see how I didn’t trust anyone in my early adulthood.  I felt like a lone wolf and as an entrepreneur this can translate to a driving force. And in the beginning of my career, I gained success... to a certain point.  I started learning that I needed to let my guard down. In relationships of business... and love. Learning to trust was the hardest thing I ever did. Through self inquiry and finding healing from my inner child, I shed the layers of distrust. And when I cracked that door open, it was less scary than I thought. In some ways it felt refreshing being more open. I even trusted myself more. I didn’t doubt my decisions ...